Monday, June 13, 2005

Recent Events

Recent events include:
  • Twisting/Spraining/Straining my left ankle Friday at work. Nothing that hasn't happened before, just enough to keep me hobbling around for a couple of days.
  • Watching some taped interviews w/misc. politicians & pundits I had backlogged. I am now to the bottom of my "to-watch" stack of VHS tapes. I just need to twist/sprain/strain my right ankle and then I can do something about these Newsweeks and U.S. News & World Reports.
  • Eating plenty of watermelon. I bring a great big tupperware container full of the stuff to work every day it's in season. I have great hopes that frankenfoods and increased global trade will work together to one day bring me delicious watermelon all year round. And yes, I know the cited source is probably eating out of the palm of some ADM lobbyist.
  • Watching the movie "Game Over: Kasparov and the Machine" about the human chess champ taking on the 0s-&-1s-fueled Big Blue. I'm trying to decide what I thought about this documentary before commenting on it further.
  • Buying a chainsaw. It's the first one I have ever had occasion to own. I thought one with a gas engine would look cooler, but the ones with electric cords were lower maintenance and cheaper, so they talked me into getting one like that. This inspired a couple of ideas for my first horror movie... the bad guy would be a chainsaw killer who didn't own a portable, gas-powered model and so instead had to do his work while plugged into an extension cord. The surviving hero/heroine would be forced to flee to a spooky old house in the middle of nowhere. But wait! The killer has followed them! His downfall? The old-fashioned farmhouse only has two prongs per electric socket and he can't find anywhere to plug in his chainsaw. Teenage heroine makes sassy comment about killer not being grounded in reality and holds up the only 2-prong/3-prong adapter in the house. Killer lunges for it as she throws it out the window. Killer falls to his death with the tangled extension cord, caught on a table leg, forming a fatal noose. Tenative title: "The Merchant of Menace." (He only takes a pound of flesh from each victim.)

"Honey! Why isn't this thing plugged in? Those Shemps are almost here!"

"Look, do you think my hair gets like this without a dryer?"

Props to Sam Raimi and Bruce Campbell.


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